Here, and Not Here
I have returned. And yet, still I have few words to share. I may have run out of words. As I delve deeper and deeper into my relationships with my gods and spirits, and the practices that stem from them, I find that while I must still translate these things in some tangible way for the world at large, I may only be able to do so obliquely, through Art. Blogging, at least, seems a very limited medium to me right now.
In the coming months, I will be exploring the history of a secret language born in the travelling carnivals of the 1930′s, originally taught to me by my grandparents, which my dreams have told me will bring me closer to my spirits. I will be preparing to lead a group of masked mummers through the streets of my city to drive away the darkness after the year has ended. I will be calling on Odin more often, quite literally, and learning how my breath and voice can provide a road for the Wild Hunt to ride on. And that is just part of the Work of one season.
This last month has been full of unexpected events. I have risen to the challenge to cast off my lists and plans and rigid ideas and more fully embrace the moment. I am more free than I have ever been. (It is terrifying. I wake up in a panic some nights. And I love it, and I must do it – Dionysos has made that clear.) Each day I choose my path, no longer relying on the past or assumptions or habits but only Who I belong to and how best to love Them. I have no idea what will come next, but I think it will be powerful, because I can feel the power surrounding me. πάντα χωρεῖ καὶ οὐδὲν μένει.
I have been following the trail my spirits have left for me, and it seems to be leading somewhere really interesting (and scary, and dark, and there is no map, just this path of white stones gleaming in the moonlight, but I am friends with the monsters in the forest, and my pockets are heavy with offerings). I don’t know how many more missives like these I have left in me. If I disappear entirely, be assured I am in the company of the creatures I love best.